« July 2005 | Main | September 2005 »
Casual throwaway vulgarity is almost always entertaining, but why is this particular expression so funny?
PS Yes, it's true - I had an appointment with Mr. Henley yesterday. No, I didn't chicken out. Yes, he wore the damn suit. No, he is not Robin Hely. And yes, he is quite the character. That is all. No correspondence etc.
About a young man who has a crush on worthless popular chanteuse and actress Hilary Duff.
"I've got a crush," the chorus declares, "on Hilary Duff", before going on to explain that Ms. Duff, in the estimation of the artiste, is possessed of "the right stuff" and other such desirable attributes.
It was the cheesiest piece of trash I ever heard. Apparently it's been around for a while. I'm glad I missed it.
Apologies. Normal service will resume eventually.
>Let me tell you a few words about my experience.
>I was completely broken when I learned that I have
>problems with erectile dysfunction. A month I was as
>a dark cloud but then I learned about Soft Viagra and
>now I am happy as an angel.
>
>LEARN MORE
>
>
>
>Remove your email
"From: Crispin Black
To: [me]
Date: 22 August 2005 12:51:49 PM
Re: New CEO
Dear Operative [Teigan],
Due to your status as a relatively high-profile Inducted Operative, and the well-informed nature of your enquiry, Olga Chekhova has forwarded your most recent email to me for response.
Your supposition that Neurocam is beginning to move out of the state of remission in which it has resided since the suspension of senior staff on July 13 is correct.
Charles Hastings has successfully reapplied for the position of Director of Operations, reaffirming his commitment to this crucial role within the organization, and is currently collaborating with the Nautonier Liaison in assessing candidates for CEO.
An announcement regarding the appointment may be expected by Thursday 1st September at the very latest.
I have been appointed by the Nautonier to conduct a thorough assessment of Neurocam's current state, and form recommendations regarding the best way forward for the organization - a task I have now completed - and oversee the implementation of these until such time as it is determined that my services are no longer necessary to ensure the continued stable functioning of NCI.
The Neurocam website will be relaunching with a new design very soon. New applications will be reopened at this time.
Except as noted, you are encouraged to publish this communique on your weblog.
Regards,
Crispin Black
Transitional Co-ordinator
Neurocam International
crispin.black@neurocam.com"
UPDATE - Then there's this.
From: teurqjfbjac@yahoo.com Subject: Start when you need itHow often we are at a loss when we don’t have enough strength to satisfy our sex partner.
With CIALIS you will forget about this confusing problems at all.
Just one pill and you can have great sex anytime you like, in difference with other medical remedies!
CHOOSE YOURSELF WHEN YOU SHOULD DO IT
Remove your email
Where would I be without them? (Probably dead.)
And I don't really mind when I do, because it is so often so amusing and strange.
>From: uvlbjnfixig@yahoo.com
>Subject: Brutal family sex!
>
>These young daughters have never thought of anything like this before.
>
>CLICK HERE FOR FREE TOUR
>
>
>click here to remove email
I'm guest-adminning for Desci at the moment whilst she and her much-discussed boyfriend are out chasing this halfway around the country for a week. In her abscence she's arranged for a Fitsian smorgasboard of exciting and dynamic guestposters to stimulate her readership daily in the manner to which they've become accustomed. You should really check it out.
Operative Cronin (formerly tobyesterhase) gave up blogging for a while, but is happily back, and brings detailed news of the operative meetup in Buffalo, New York back in June.
And the inimitable Nada Awad aka Deadsoybean has quit blogging (and gone all Quilly on our asses), which is, contrastingly, sad. But she has her reasons.
To be assessed by a recruitment agency who are going to get me a (slightly more) lucrative job in a stupid callcentre.
Wish me luck!!
Enquiring minds want to know.
Not including 5c coins and the $1.62 in my bank account: eight dollars and thirty cents.
What should I spend it on?
I get paid tomorrow, and I've enough food stashed for tonight. I was thinking maybe stuff for breakfast (milk, bread, eggs - that kind of thing) but that's so mundane, and I crave novelty.
As advised at Chez Rorschach, my position on the Big Brother question: Vesna was robbed, but our maturity and commonsense as a nation will prevail tonight when Tim, quite easily the least obnoxious BB contestant ever, emerges rightly victorious.
(UPDATE - I've said it before, and I'll say it again: there's something wrong with the world. I don't know what it is, but I feel it - like a splinter in the back of my mind, driving me mad..)
I just installed Skype and used it to have a lovely chat with Li. It worked great even though I only have a dialup. I've never been much of a one for IM-type things, but this is way cool and I will be leaving it up whenever I am online from now on, which is often.
My Skype handle is teigan84; giz a call sometime. Seriously, it's so easy.
Not that I'm a part of it or anything, you understand.
... be none other than notorious master of disguise, Robert Henley?
Or this unfortunate character...
...encountered suspended from an electricity pole outside this otherwise unexceptional north Melbourne train station?
What about this guy?
On 17/7/05, Robin Hely wrote:
> That damned Henley! He would sell his own Gran for a buck....
When he's not too busy putting on exhibitions called "Who Is Robin Hely?", maybe.
And then there's this. Retrocam goodness! (UPDATE - Or not. Trust me: it was good while it lasted..)
PS I am curious as to who went through my entire archive earlier this evening, looking at pretty much all the comments back to April. Was it you?
Well, I do.
More recent search hits:
(How did this wind up in my referrers?)
Jobs I would rather have:
That reminds me; I have to go to work. I'm half an hour late!
I hate my life.
There will be no new post until Jo pulls her finger out. Go hassle her.
Via refused-classification.com.
South Australian No Pokies MP Nick Xenophon said it was outrageous that a toy marketed at children aged four and over featured a pokies-style game.Incidentally, my second generation Tamagotchi, Bodah, passed away quietly on the 15th of July. He was handsome, but otherwise undistinguished.
Mr Xenophon wants the toy banned or at least given an R rating by the Office of Film and Literature Classification.[Note: There is no 'R' rating for computer games, there is only 'banned'.]
The toy has a G rating.
"This virtual pet encourages children as young as four to participate in poker machine-style gambling," Mr Xenophon said today.
"Kids become so emotionally attached to these toys that they grieve for them when they die.
"This version ... should not be available to children.
"Research here and overseas shows that these games can turn the kids of today in to the gambling addicts of tomorrow."
One Adelaide father had taken the toy away from his six-year-old son after becoming concerned about the pokies game, Mr Xenophon said.
I had the most horrendous, terrifying nightmare ever last night. In the dream I was only half asleep - I have memories of getting out of bed and walking around my little cupboard - but what was going down was so extreme I must really have been fully asleep. Amorphous, unbelievably malevolent pan-dimensional beings were inside my head and in the very fabric of the air, trying to drive me completely insane in absolutely the worst possible way. And succeeding.
It was really like being in hell.
In retrospect, I find it incredibly cool that my brain is capable of creating such spectacular effects.
Posts will likely be a bit thin on the ground this week. I am feeling sick and demoralised and - just for a change - I have a stack of email that I really want to clear.
Jo is taking me to Luna Park on Thursday. It's just down the road from where I live but I've never been. We shall eat faerie floss and go on the Faerris Wheel. If it's open. Which, looking at their site, it isn't. Unless it's school holidays right now. Is it school holidays? It isn't, is it. Damn.
I've also been encouraged to attend a certain event on Friday, which should be interesting.. although I probably won't be able to say much about it.
What else? Dan "Conchis" Pritchard is drawing attention to himself again. Dunno what it's about, but it seems to have something to do with the return of the legendary Robert Henley and they're all over it on the Neuroboards.
Here are some nice bonus pics of The Magus burning which somehow got left out last time:
My silver iPod mini (codename: Magnus) had been misbehaving; the battery wouldn't hold a charge for longer than 20 minutes. But it was a gift purchased at Cash Converters and I didn't have a receipt for it. Still don't.
I was a little concerned about this, but I need not have been.
I simply went to the appropriate page on the Apple website, gave them my serial number, filled out a short multiple choice test description of the problem, and with no futher questions asked, by some miracle of internet/real-world crossover technology, a new (well, refurbished) one arrived via the analog postal service today, a week later.
Now I have to post my broken one back to them and they will refurbish it and send it to someone else. I have this warm, glowing sensation; I'm really a part of something.
Hooray for Apple, the large corporation it's sort of okay not to despise.
(Subsequent to actually opening said package: it transpires that Steve & co. have, in fact, sent me a refurbished power adapter, which is of no use at all. Hmph.)
In other happy news, Ms Fits has acknowledged my existence. I feel a bewildering array of emotions. Of course this is a joyous occasion and a vindication of many years of struggle but I am somewhat plagued by a sense of unworthiness.
Also: what am I to do with the rest of my life?
